30 Gay Things Before 30

Updated: Feb 25, 2020

Three weeks ago, I turned the big THREE - OH and honestly it wasn’t as life-changing as I thought it was going to be. Okay, let me rephrase that, I didn’t see the exploding fireworks, the old lady cane or the depends diapers make their way on me. Instead, I saw the same woman, who I was 30 seconds before the clock struck 12 just turn another year older, but just as foolish and youthful as I was at the age of 29.

Because I’ve come out later in life, I knew that there were some learning curves that I needed to overcome, challenges that I needed to face, and experiences that I needed to have, to thrive within the LGBTQ+ community and within myself.

So I present to you 30 GAY things I’ve learned before turning 30:

  • There are more identifying people in the LGBTQ+ community than the L.G.B.T.Q can stand for queer or questioning.

  • Not all lesbians are masculine.

  • Not all lesbians are feminine.

  • There’s such a term called “pillow princess.”

  • There's more than one way to finger a woman.

  • Trans right ARE human rights.

  • It’s okay to change how you identify, even when you’ve already identified.


  • Even though LGBTQ+ rights are progressing, it doesn’t mean that ALL people have progressed.

  • Your tongue is a powerful tool.

  • For some people, having long nails is an indicator that you’re straight.

  • The pride flag is not as commonly worn as you think.

  • Flannel and combat boots are the staples in a women’s closet.

  • Not all gay men are flamboyant.

  • There’s isn’t a spectrum on bisexuality.

  • There are LGBTQ+ people all around the world. (Don’t ask me why I never thought of this, but here we are.)

  • Saying you’re “half a lesbian,” because you’re not ready to say that you like women, is confusing, but okay.


  • Pride events are beautiful and liberating.

  • Your closest friends or family will not accept you, just because you’re friends and family, Non-monogamous people exist.

  • Gender is a social construct.

  • Your masculinity energy doesn’t make you any less of a woman.

  • Non-binary people exist.

  • Dildos/Strap-ons are difficult, yet funny to use your first couple of rounds.

  • Intimacy is more than just sex.

  • There’s more to “lesbian sex” than just going down on someone.

  • All dating apps are NOT the same when it comes to LGBTQ+ people.


I hope you all found this enjoyable and something you can relate to. Also, just because I learned these things doesn’t mean that everyone else has learned them, and it doesn’t mean that these are the ONLY things I’ve learned either. This is just the top 30 things that stuck out to me.

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